Pain the topic of conversation

Pain be it physical or emotional, comes right after the weather and sports. The topic is beaten to death, because we are resurrecting it from the death. The pain was there, is no longer there, but the memory lingers on. We really bring it back to life when we talk of the pain that we had suffered in the past. We breathe life into the pain by talking about it and going through every detail of it. We acquire a macabre sense of the dead pain.

We add dimensions to the pain, that were not there when it really happened. For eg. A lady goes through a divorce, and she has taken the way out, what-ever be the reason,  her husband was unfaithful, or was abusive, or was addicted, or etc. She is well rid of the man, she should be happy. Her life is her own now, and she is in a better place mentally, but no, she has to carry the pain of the divorce with her everywhere she goes. She has to feel the victim, to draw attention to her plight, so she tells her divorce tale, as she is the tragic heroine of the story. She has to keep the pain alive by repeated narrations, or she will lose the sympathy and her part as the heroine. This attention is what she did not get in marriage, now in divorce she gets it.

But what, if she stops playing the tragic heroine and starts afresh as if the divorce had not taken place, forgives the husband his wrong doing and moves on, what then. She reclaims her power to be who she really is, and lives a happier life, more content that there is no husband who abuses, or unfaithful, or addicted. This new her can chart a new course for her life to go to. A new direction, and a new dimension to reveal of self. A brand new you that is coming out of the cocoon  and turning to a butterfly. Could this not replace the old pattern, the old conversation, the old living, we can still have conversational material but with a new zest and vigor, wouldn’t this be infinitely better than the pain resurrection.

Like attracts like, they say, so what do we attract when we talk so much of pain? What is it, that we are attracting? Lets deliberate on this, and what if we choose to talk on our new found freedom, our new pain free self. What is it that we would attract? More freedom, more pain relief, more self.